Why some women are afraid to go to the gym and i might understand aswell.
I was just casually browsing through tik tok casually until i came across a video, where some pervy man was basically looking at that women ass while she was doing some squatting, until someone made a video and filmed it, and let me tell you a women with anxiety going to the gym while having ocd paranoia and worrying about someone watching her as she is doing her workout is pretty uncomfortable and i’ve experience the same with women and men. I’m making it clear that i’m not defending that kind of behaviour, because i’ve experinced the same sexist behvior while working out at the gym.
In September I decided working out again. I’ve struggled with social and general anxiety disorder whole my teenage and young adult life and going to the gym as been hard sometimes, depends on the day. Every-time my foot hits the gym floor i feel excited and ready to start my workout. I change my clother and ready to go.
I want to open the topic up with my experiences with men and women at the gym, i’ts not jus with men.
In Finland in some gyms we have separated spaces for women, another room where they can workout with other women. As I was ready, I always love going to the women side of the gym, because its usually empty at the morning hours. When i entered the women side, there were two people present doing their own workout so i thought what the hell i wanna do some deadlifts. I got the barbell and the weights and started my workout and out of nowhere i get this feeling someone is watching me, a women who was on the cable machine and was just staring behind my head, as usual i ignored it and wanted to be left alone, was my form off i don’t know and she just kept staring at me, the whole deadlift exercise, it wasn’t fun. She left the room herself, after she just stopped. She was so determined. Sometimes i get this feeling like there is some sort of other society in the world of gyms for women, basically in their side and i’m not saying all women workout, just about prefence. Rules that i’m not aware of. It happens usually everytime when i go there, to do my workout because i feel anxious and uncomfortable on the other side where there are strange men present.
Heres the other experience, i was doing weight body exercises, like for example push ups. I felt again the same familiar attention seeker behind my head, it was a different person of course and the staring just went on. I feel like some people just size each-other up, like who's better at doing what, how much weight can you fucking lift and i’ts so annoying to me and i’m sure i’m not the only one. I was doing my back on normal side of the gym, felt the stare of a young girl, who was on a yoga mat and just staring into my soul, i think you get the point. Even women can be creepy and staring at you for unknown reasons, not just the male spieces.
Heres comes the male dominative behvior types. Some are just fine you working out in the same space and some are not. Few days ago, i finished my chin ups and went on the treadmill, on the treadmill over there was a men with a red shirt. I went on as he finished his run and he went to do other exercises. As i was running i felt male a gaze and to my suprise it was the red shirted men. My run continued on the treadmill, he kept doing his and i felt but kept ignoring it. Even sometimes has i walk to a machine i feel like i am the fucking prey and there is a predatory creepy male stare, of a older guy just following me everywhere I go, thats just me being dramatic but you get the picture. I always felt like, women who like doing weighted workout like chest workout on the bench, chins up, push ups, anything that the males does, like its their job to judge what you do. Some women get anxious and paranoid that they completely avoid weighed exercises and focus on cardio instead, because it just seems less stressful. Not all men are like that, but some sure are and to be honest it gets fucking old and annoying right away and of course we can’t forget the creepy pervy guys, who use you as a inspiration for their workout goals, you get the point. Some men and women can be creepy, not just the males.
Gyms are suppose to be a place of empowerment, not prove your fucking worth for others, but for you. Where you can focus on you workout and feel good about it and not to be judged of the outcome and to feel safe of course, because going to the gym is a great form of distraction away from personal problems not to add them and abuse others. Let’s be honest we all have been that guy or girl, at the gym who just stares at everyone or have acted toxic in some way towards others. We all can’t be perfect, but can try to be and grow and learn from our mistakes.
