Basic human respect

I have suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, and dissociation throughout my teenage and young adult life, pretty much I am a loner type and introvert, who likes my own space. I don’t know if this happens to you personally, but I want to write about, things that I have to tolerate with a mental illness. I am just speaking from my perspective and not yours if you relate great. Read on then.

I am most comfortable in my own space and find it difficult to be myself around other people, so I just keep to myself. Strange men giving you look, people just staring at you, some even whispering near you, wondering if that stranger going to follow you and strangle you alive. It is because I faced way too much bullying, so I have trust issues. It’s so easy when you are alone because you feel no judgment. You can do whatever you want, in your little haven.

The thing I despise the most, grocery shopping., I hate it for a person suffering from anxiety. You enter the store full worse, thinking about the things you need the most. Rushing through everything and not focusing on the prices, only you want out. I hate the overwhelming crowds, so I just disconnect myself from my surroundings, to what I have to do to get out of that situation. After when I arrive home, remember the things that I forgot to buy.

I have kept my issues and problems to myself, the sleepless night and the time where I spent two weeks in bed, because I had no energy to get up, so I just slept there and avoided everything about my reality, wonderful isn’t. When I do talk about it my problems, just depresses me even more. When you bring it up, for example, you’re with your relatives either it gets ignored or told to get over it because everyone else has their problems, the saddest part, it is so true. If you relate, wonderful, and if not stop reading.

You cannot put a person on a pedestal, expect the person to behave the way you want them to or want them to be, it’s fucking selfish. You are deciding whether this person in your eyes, has value or not. You are removing their self-worth, morals, and values and undermine everything there where. You exploit them in their weakest state, to fit your needs. Guess what, it is time to mind your own damn life and not theirs. People are not your fucking puppets to play around with whenever you see fit. Learn some basic human respect, you don’t have to respect then fully, because you don’t know them fully, to base your judgment. You don’t know their experiences, values, or morals, so just stop controlling. Just observe and feel with your spirit and not ego. Stay in the present moment.

If you don’t respect, you don’t receive respect. Just be humble, gentle, and kind, whether people say you are weak, it is not weak. It’s fucking sexy and brave.